But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
then he tried to convert me to islam
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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