Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
