hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
