Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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