i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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