it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
We have so much sex to catch up on
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Randomize
