Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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