What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
