I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize