Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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