remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
He better not be in your backpack
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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