I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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