Fine. I'll sleep in my office
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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