So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
