We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
