Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Are we in a gay sports bar?
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
