I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
