I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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