after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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