if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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