I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I wish I only lived at night.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize