why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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