She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Randomize
