just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
