Life is so much better after having sex.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
