as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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