All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
