Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
