I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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