he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Randomize
