Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
he was CRYING into my vagina
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
