well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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