Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
