Your mouth is God's brothel.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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