oh god the rape fog is back!
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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