some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
