i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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