She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
"it" just moved
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
