what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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