You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
