Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize