A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Randomize
