brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
