ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
