i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
