I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
