She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
