didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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