But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
When are your genitals available?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
