I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
